For Bethany

Author: Shexpeare /

Why I can't play WOW (or for the fools in the none gaming world.... world of warcraft).
My reasons are ten fold. And... if they aren't ACTUALLY ten fold, they will be after I make this list of ten reasons why I can't play WOW.

1. It costs money. A constant flow of money.
2. I already stay up late enough with normal video games.
3. I have an addictive personality. I'm pretty sure this has been proven with Dr. Pepper. Xbox. Desperate Housewives. I don't need more.
4. The people who come into gamestop who play WOW... Okay. Sometimes they are really cool like Grawrock, but other times... they scare me. The smell. The crazy look in their eye from the 20 min withdrawls to get to the store. It WORRIES ME BETHANY.
5. I do NOT want to meet my husband over WOW. If its going to be geeky, it better be at a star wars convention. And knowing me, it seems far too possible.
6. I'm already lazy and sit around. I would get fat..... er.
7. Math.
8. I like video games with stories.. and ENDINGS.
9. Now its like the principle of the matter.
10. To make you mad. :D


Author: Shexpeare /

"I have the choice of being constantly active and happy, or introspectively passive and sad. Or I can go mad by ricocheting in between."-Sylvia Plath

Dear Dancers:

The dance concert made me realize a few things. Thought I'd share them with you.

  • Dancers are crazy cool. They make it look so easy. DARN THEM! :D Proud to know'em. I want to be friends with more of'em. Like, pokemon, I gotta catch'em all.

  • No matter how much you push, there are some people who will be constants in your life, and I'm really grateful for that.

  • I'm going to miss the community... family I've built here... From scratch. I built it from scratch and I love it. Them. They've touched me. Left a mark on me. I'll miss it. It was enough for a time.

  • Plath had a point. I'm going mad. I must find peace before I go mad. A happy medium. The rollercoaster needs to end.

  • I need art. Finals have been driving me up the wall, and the thing I needed to settle my stomach was art.

So thanks for giving me the cathartic night I needed. For being committed to art in a world full of chaos. You do the kind of work that can touch people, and in my years here... has touched me. So. There. I was a cheeseball. Thanks guys.

Annual I'm Grateful For Stuff List

Author: Shexpeare /

Things I'm especially grateful on this, the day of thanks.

  • Music. I'm not sure I could have surivived the last year and half without music.
  • I'm thankful for my roomates. They are pretty cool people.
  • Kaitlin. Without her artistic ventures my life would be a lot more boring. She brings a lightness to the house, and I enjoy saying hello to her everymorning.
  • Suki. My own personal Mario. Mainly because we are siblings and I'm taller. And because apparently we have a Bromance. I think that sums up our relationship pretty well. I love you bro! Your scarfs keep me warm,
  • Nenny. I thought when we moved in I might lose that escape that was Jen's House. Turns out your room is just as safe. Thanks for the safe hide-a-way.
  • Smelly. Who else would I tease?! Haha. Maybe its strange that I tease you like I would a younger sibling, but hey, I never had a real one so... Thanks for the music. A freakin' Ipod- WHO ARE YOU? Its been a rough year for us, but we last because we're awesome and I love ya.
  • My brothers.
  • I'm thankful that I have the coolest parents in the world.
  • Shawnna Cope. I know I haven't known her long, and she's far away, and I suppose we hardly know each other. But on the other hand, I trust her implicitly. More than most people. And I love her a whole lot. Shaw-Shaw-Shawnna's Legs. I also appreciate how ridiculously talented she is.
  • Zombies.
  • Kristen doing improv with me. 'Nough said Agent Cleo. :D
  • Text Messaging. Hahaha A lot of people mock texting (including myself), but I seriously love it.
  • My serial killer half brother Eric. He's become one of my best friends. And one day we will play Scrabble with the Hall family.
  • Twilight fans, for reminding me how obsessed I was with Nsync.
  • Theatre. It has the power to heal. And as an art it has a special place in my heart. I don't know what I would have done without shows like Facing East and Life Without Parole. Man. Thats like... therapy.
  • Meggan. Oh Meggan. I miss you. I miss "living" with you. And sharing art with you in a unique way.
  • London Bed Time Stories and my Theatre Journal. They define the kind of art I want to be involved in.
  • Scott Brazee and his MAD art skills. I miss you buddy.
  • Speaking of missing, I'm thankful for Alex Allred's letters. They make me laugh when I really need it.
  • Grawrocks! For having such a fun house to party at, and for inviting me to dinner when I was stuck in Cedar for Thanksgiving.
  • I'm thankful for Catherine! Thank you for being an incredibly brave, intelligent, funny person. My life would not be as rich of an experience if you weren't in it. I love you so much besty!
  • Lady Macbeth!
  • Lucy. :D

Irene Ryan nomination. I say yes to that. :D

Achievements? I feel so... achieved.

Author: Shexpeare /

So many video games. So little time.
My current adventures alone:

This is a game that as I child I never beat. I would start it and get pretty far, but the ending was just too frustrating as a child who thought the power rangers ought to be invincible. Well, I finally beat it, and watching Zack, our original black ranger dance his heart out wasnt really the ending I was looking for.

I'm going through Final Fantasy 6 again. I really should beat 4 before I beat 6... AGAIN. But its my favorite Final Fantasy. The music is delightful. The cast is one of the best in a video game. The ensemble really makes this game more enjoyable then most.

My adventures with Eric, my serial killing adopted brother... Dexter?:

I haven't played the alternative edition yet, but in order to accurately show my love for resident evil 5, there has to be a picture of Chris and Jill. Beat this game so many times and I still enjoy it.
My one qualm, why couldn't capcom just let Chris and Jill freaking KISS already at the end of the game. Like. What the hell guys. I was very happy she was alive. But one step further would have MADE THIS GAME THAT MUCH MORE EPIC.
You know what I say to cheesy dialogue and no kissing.

Zoey is my hero. If there was ever a college zombie killer who I related to, its her. Also played this at Chris' surprise birthday party. Who knew that versus mode could be so fun. I enjoy being a zombie just as much as a survivor. "I'm killing Rev! YAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!"

I loved Halo 3. And I loved this game. Flew through it with Eric. Something about the halo controls is intoxicating. Thats why at anytime there are thousands of geeks online screaming "GOOD GAME!" or rather "GG"

What need we fear who knows it when none can call our power to accompt?

Author: Shexpeare /

Lady Macbeth.
Macbeth ended almost a month ago, but I never had the chance to blog about it, so here it is.
Shakespeare makes me really happy. There is something so satisfying when the words are coming out of your mouth, and the language just takes over.
I love plays. But Shakespeare holds a special place. I suppose that explains the Classical Acting degree I'm trying to get.
When you ask girls what Shakespearean roles they would like to take on, people usually say Lady Macbeth somewhere in the mix. She is universally attractive to most actresses.
She isn't the first person I would have named. (Probably because King Lear is my favorite play, or maybe just because I wanted to say something different.) But she is now. I really love her more than I thought possible. I think she might be my favorite role...
There is something so tragic about how far she falls and how badly it hurts.
Wishes may bring problems,
Such that you regret them.
Better that, though,
Than to never get them...
She is so hopeless that she takes her own life. How does that happen to someone so determined, strong willed... Is there a way back?
I guess it doesn't matter if there is, because she doesn't see it.

What do I think of Ellesse H-greaves?

Author: Shexpeare /

ELLESSE IS SO AWESOME! ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse

(intake of breath)

ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse ellesse
What's that? Lord of the Rings is better than Star Wars?
What's that? Ellesse is more lovely than Natalie Portman?
What's that? Harry Potter could kick Anakin's trash?

Loving ellesse=√
Payback for always changing my facebook status when I'm not there=√√√√√√√√√√√√√√√√√√√√

Done & Done

I'm In Slytherin. Sorry Mom, Sorry God.

Author: Shexpeare /

I'm going to drill Jar Jar Binks' Teeth until I hit his BRAIN.

Author: Shexpeare /

Today I went to the dentist. I recall the Little Shop dentist.
I really hate the dentist. Alright, alright. I don't hate MY dentist. (Either the Orem or Cedar one.) I just hate the idea of the dentist. I hate going to the dentist. I despise my bad teeth. I've had a lot of work done in my short time here on earth. I should be use to it by now. But the sound of drilling in my brain still sounds like someone gnawing on my jawbone. I get sweaty, nervous, and have nightmares weeks in advance.
Today I went to the dentist.
They let me watch Star Wars: The Phantom Menace. (I brought my own copy, and the dentist, Chase, noted that he should get copies for the office. I mean, star wars IS that good.) This was a nice distraction for the most part. He gave me a lot of shots. Besides the first poke, I really appreciated it. :D I kept thinking... THIS! THIS IS THE WORST THING EVER! The drilling, the saliva and dry lips. The drilling THE DRILLING! The noise and smell... and then... THEN
Seriously. No matter how attractive Ewan is, or Liam is... hardly anything can make up for Jar Jar Binks. And that DAMN KID WHO PLAYS ANAKIN. Sheesh.
No, No Natalie Portman, please do NOT save Jar Jar from getting his hand mangled in the pod racer. Maybe he would lose a lot of blood and die. No, NO! LIAM JUST LET THE GUNGANS PUNISH HIM! *sigh* Is my tooth done yet?
I'm getting a cap, crown, whatever, and I'm tempted to get a gold one like Johnny Depp. I can see him poking away at me in his glasses. DONT LOOK IN HIS GLASSES. Whew. The hard part is over and now they just need to get it to stick. My fake one. They'll order me a real one.... I should've gotten a GOLD TOOTH.
Okay, so it wasn't too bad today. I mean, I HATE it, but it wasn't too bad. Not as bad as the root canal. The pain before the root canal.
Okay. I've ranted a lot. I think you can tell I was panicked.
Apparently Sally Hughes is here today. And its my last day here before school starts! I'm leaving tomorrow! How lucky is that! I'll be happy to see her, as she is one of my favorite people.
Cathy is coming home. In two days (unless a storm comes and ruins lives. :D) Finally! Some good ol' Cafe Rio, Barnes and Noble, Theatre Going BESTY TIME!
Listen to the NES remake of Sweet Child O' Mine. AWESOME. Reminds me of final fantasy and zelda. So cool!
I think I'm going to be friends with Mike. That will be good I think. The end.

I recently went on a date with my first childhood crush. And... I don't have feelings for him or anything- it just gave me this weird closure. I was so happy about it. I can just imagine little me, being ridiculously happy that I was finally going on a date with my first crush. Childhood me is happy about it. Therefore I am. :D Its weird how things work out. It makes me happy to think of how giddy little me might have been.

I really love living with Jen. In case anyone was curious. There is this new found closeness. I mean, we have always been close. Always, from the moment we met. But, its different. Because now I actually get to spend time with her. Its just a little different. I like it.
I miss Rhett! Talked to him today for a bit on facebook, and he's just cool. The end.
Last night it was pretty late, and I had to work this morning. Jen and I kept saying "WE NEED TO GO TO BED!" I was about to sleep, and who shows up at my door! MEGGAN!!!!! Now. I love meggan. But I didn't think we had so much to catch up on that we would stay up until 6 am.... we did. Gosh I miss having her around.
Cathy will be home in 18 days. Happiness.

Thats cool. Not sure how accurate is. But whatever. I rock!

Author: Shexpeare /

I took a lot of these online. This one makes me look best. But the lowest I got was 92 wpm. So. I always look pretty awesome.

106 words

Speed test

Harry Potter and The Crazy Costumed Fiends!

Author: Shexpeare /

I'm so excited for Harry Potter to come out tomorrow night. I have my tickets, and my costume and my wizard/witch crew! Ready to go!! I'm going to Pansy, as always. Good ol' Slytherin scum. Last night we watched all the Harry Potter movies. Fun marathon. There was a lot of heckling. Until we reached the fifth movie, which I actually like. :D
We also made everyone wands!!!! They are blood brilliant! Seriously they look fantastic! SO EXCITED!!!! GOD BLESS HARRY POTTER DAY!

Never so good- I both hate and love, knowing not which is which. I wont be able to stop hurting you, you know. Freedom is about building a better world. Its about being and doing whatever you want. We didnt win the war so people could indulge themselves! Harold, no one cares.


Author: Shexpeare /

Its good to know that there are still cultured people in our society.... SEE YOU AT THE THEATRE! *smile* DING!
And I quote-
"The majority of people attending theatre performances are not interested one bit in the play, but mostly in being seen by the others. Its a social status. Second to that, with any couple you happen to catch taking a seat, be nice to the husband and offer him a sympathetic smile for he just lost an argument with his wife and is missing out on tonight's wrestling match in favor of you.

Empty seats mean honest people, saying "You dont perform well enough for me to come". Or...they just won the argument with their wife."

It seems that for the longest time now, all I've been having is nightmares. I wake up, and my heart is pounding in my ears, I feel disgusting, and even if I can't recall the details I remember the feeling. I know I've had a nightmare. It's like waking up on the wrong side of the bed every morning. Blarg.

Fram asks... is theatre obsolete. Are there things that theatre and poetry can't capture? I think the answer is no. I believe in the empty spaces in theatre. The imagination can capture anything.

Bash- Neil Labute.

Author: Shexpeare /

Aaron Eckhart said somthing like... having a testimony, or being around people who have testimonies doesn't save you.
I think I might know these people. Less epic versions of them at least.

Invisible Monster- Chuck Palahniuk. Find good in what the world says is evil.

Author: Shexpeare /

"Sorry, mom. Sorry, God."
"The one you love, and the one who loves you are never, ever the same person."
"Nothing of me is original. I am the combined effort of everyone I've ever known."
"When did the future switch from being a promise to being a threat?"
"No matter how much you think you love somebody, you'll step back when the pool of their blood edges up too close." 
"Give me lust, baby. 

Give me malice. 
Give me detached existentialist ennui. 
Give me rampant intellectualism as a coping mechanism." 
Everything before now, before now, before now, is just a story I carry around. I guess that would apply to anybody in the world. What I need is a new story about who I am. 
What I need to do is fuck up so bad I can't save myself." 
"You can only hold a smile for so long, after that it's just teeth." 

Blankets- Craig Thompson.

Author: Shexpeare /

"You have so many layers, that you can peel away a few, and everyone's so shocked or impressed that you're baring your soul, while to you it's nothing, because you know you've twenty more layers to go." 

"How satisfying it is to leave a mark on a blank surface. To make a map of my movement - no matter how temporary."

"Shame is always easier to handle if you have someone to share it with." 

Fram- Tony Harrison. Once you've seen famine your wonder about art.

Author: Shexpeare /

"The only thing an actress like me needs to do 

is say onstage I'm starving, and you'll believe it's true."

"Sorry if I'm not actually starving."
"Man cannot rely on the sun being eternal. One day the sun will die.
Humanity will die with temperatures so low
and it will mean the end of everything we know."

"But what if humanity could co-operate
and collectively save the doomed globe from its fate?"

"Yeah, that fucked my brain.
Nansen's idea of chit-chat or bedtime conversation
conjuring up the vision of the globe's annihilation,
I think that that belief of his helped put into my head
that life had no purpose and I was better dead."

"Can you look into your heart and find empathy
with those destined to be losers, like me, like me like me?"

 "I've seen it so many times but now the flag that's flown
and the brains that burst out with it are no beast's but are my own,
a blast of flapping banner, a gory banderole,
a bloodflag with the blazon of my brain-sick blackened soul."
"You've got to steel your mind and heart to gaze into that void
and then commit to action abd be busily employed.
We create our purpose, we create our goal.
And now it's helping humankind, not reaching the North Pole.
Science says its certain, Johansen's desperate reaction
was drink, depression, suicide, mine was always action."

"Don't envy you that. Can't imagine anything worse
than gave to hear some British broad spouting fucking verse."

"We must keep on challenging language to engage
with all we suffer from in this new modern age.
If it doesn't have the words we must challenge it to find
new ones that will measure up to the disasters of mankind."

"The messenger speech. A messenger speech
reaches depths in the heart mere pictures never reach.
If the messenger's on target, the mind's eye of the hearer
more than vision itself brings horror even nearer."

I love my new apartment. You know when you move into a place and it automatically feels like home? Yeah. Its just home now.
Today should be a good day. I don't have work, I'm going to lunch with Jen, Hye Soo and Ellesse and then going to see a movie with Jen tonight. Yay. Neil Labute is ripping a new one in my wrists. In a good way. Is that possible?

"Sit back and relish the simplicity. There is great pleasure to be had in a world of limits."

Author: Shexpeare /

"Actors sitting onstage with nothing but a script, a rudimentary set, and minimal lighting, communing with the audience while pushing all the right buttons- that is a sight that I personally never tire of, no matter how many times I see it."

"Years ago Wallace Shawn wrote a terrific one-hander called The Fever, and in the author's note, he spoke of a desire to see his play performed in living rooms, in front of audiences of ten or twelve people. I feel the same way. Theatre is anywhere you make it. I hope that with this print edition of autobahn actors take the text and memorize it, gather their friends in their own cars, and take off down the road, fillin those intimate interiors with my words and their emotions. That would be a pleasure to behold."

I'm going to do this. I want to do "Funny." Anyone who would like to join me is welcome to. It is going to be wonderful. I want to do more plays in my living room. Because he is right. Theatre is anywhere you make it.

"The pleasure I get from setting up a couple of chairs on a bare stage and getting down to work with actors and an audience will never be bested. I promise you. Peter Brook, that clever old bastared, was right on the money about the joys of an empty space. You should try it sometime."
Thanks Neil! You always remind me of the kind of art I want to do for the rest of my life!!!!!

Neil Labute: The Done and Dones.

  • The Shape of Things
  • Wrecks: And Other Plays
  • Some Girl(s)
  • Fat Pig
  • Reasons to Be Pretty
  • In the Company of Men
  • The Mercy Seat
  • Autobahn

Neil Labute: The I Can't Waits.

  • This is How it Goes
  • The Distance from Here
  • In a Dark Dark House
  • Bash: Latter-day Plays
  • Your Friends and Neighbors

Blink and you'll miss it.

Driving home from the cruise! It was a relaxing fantastic trip! But im in the vegas heat and dying now. Ill let you know if i make it home.

We are going on a cruise!!!! DITCH ELLESSE! 2009!!!

Author: Shexpeare /

I'm funny.

Another Awesome Voice Acting Discovery

Author: Shexpeare /

Alyson Court- Claire Redfield in Resident Evil and Jubliee in X-men!!!!
"I blow stuff up"
Oh yeah! I was playing umbrella chronicles and I forget that resident evil has some of the worst lines in the world. Some of my favorites:
"That was too close. You were almost a Jill sandwich!"
"WHOOOOAAAAA! This hall is dangerous!"
"Here, take this lock pick. I'm sure that you, the master of unlocking, will make use of it."
All Barry. Poor Barry.Yeah.
I like in umbrella chronicles "I'll miss our target practice sessions together." after a friend dies? Really?! REALLY?!?!?!? Chris is awesome. Stupid sounding line=Classic Resident Evil.
Wesker: "Until we meet again. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!"

My brother just trapped me in the middle of one of those rotating doors. I feel twelve again. In a good way... I think. The boys will be home soon. Crazy. Two years. Its weird when you dont see someone who is such an important part of your life.

Im in a truck right now that is single handedly causing global warming. The signal arrow sounds like a crying duck. Obnoxious. :)

By the way. I. love. Deadpool. Yay. I liked wolverine a hefty lot. Did i mention he came to origins and thought afterwords 'whats MY origin?' thus the movie was made.

Playing umbrella chronicles and watching desperate housewives. Im suddenly imagining what dana delaney would look like as a zombie...Sorry. I would still have to kill you.

The cast of friends are my friends when i have no friends around. Im okay with that.

A big thank you to Rhett for the phone charger. This is being posted through text and that would not be possible without said charger. You will be missed. Not just because of free phone chargers. But as a starbucks friday buddy, an artist and friend- well. I really love and value you buddy. Its okay. Its not over til the fat lady lets us act together. Go get um guter. The world doesnt know what they are gaining. Yet. Cant wait to sleep on your floor in new york. Buy me a hotdog?

new apartments, jobs, and beetastic fun

Author: Shexpeare /

The smell of my neighbors grass. The shade. Sort of my childhood. It felt nice being here for a warm day. I feel like every time I come home its been cold.
I moved into a new apartment. Shady something something. Sounds sketchy. Probably is. I really like the living space. Rhett gave us his couches and I'm going to live with Jenny and Hye Soo this summer.
I have played so much Rock Band in the last few days that I am beginning to think that @, The Doctor, Kookamex, and Reggie are real people. But can you blame me? After the last week of school, finals, moving and cleaning I just needed a break. Oh man- and the bees. Don't even get me started on the freakish amount of bees I killed in our apartment. (Hye Soo was no help. I sprayed and swatted like a mad woman ALONE. This is what I imagine a zombie attack would be like. Me carefully opening doors, screamin, swatting, running. And Ellesse is the next room still playing Rock Band.) Oh the bees got worse. Apparently there was a SCARY ASS SWARM. And a really huge bee hive. Glad we got out of there alive.
Also I'm working at Gamestop now. Muahahaha. Awesome.
Charna Halpern workshop. Yes, yes and more yes! :D
Oh! Origins went so well. What a wonderful piece to be involved in. Its really enhanced the way I view theatre and life! And I love the girls.
Alex is a missionary!!!
The news that proceeds all of this good news is "Best Friend Not Coming Home. Stop. Phone Broke In Half. Stop. Do Not Pass Go. Stop. Do Not Collect $200. Stop. Try Not To Shoot Self. Stop." So I figure it allllll evens out in the end.


Author: Shexpeare /

I love Origins. Being a part of that piece meant so much to all of us...
I love you girls so much! Thank you! And thank you to Hye Soo especially!

"Peter Sham is speechless because he's just witnessed the most extraordinary piece of theatre he's ever seen on a Utah stage. And he knows something that he as only suspected till now -- Hye Soo, Jen, Anatasha, Kaitlin, Kristen, Carrie, Ellesse & Shani are better teachers than he'll ever be . . . and that's alright. I'm so blessed and humbled to be a part of your world. 12 hours ago"

Well. I have been meaning to catch up on my blog. I promise myself- ill do it once hell week is over.

please come home

In 6 days I'll be exactly where I've wanted to be for 6 months.
Also, I woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.
Too also, I'm very excited for my birthday tomorrow.
As well too also, it is going to be the best summer ever.

I get to see my besty in 10 days.

I haven't written in a while because I've been busy. Even right now... I SHOULD be doing something else. *Stops to find monologue*
*finds monologue, 2 minutes later*
Alright. I'm super quick. Now what was I saying? Oh yes, there is always something I SHOULD be doing besides blogging. But I promise I'll fill you in once this week is over. Lets just say, ACTF was awesome. And CLOSER has been so freakin' great. Crazy busy, and sometimes stressful, but so fantastic.

fun facts about your favorite asian. (Scoot over hye soo.)

Author: Shexpeare /

I've been tagged in like... a thousand of these on facebook so I feel I must do one now. Ugh. Which brings me to number one.

1. I hate forwards. In emails. I hate when people forward me things. You know those dumb jokes and pictures? The only person who can do so without totally pissing me off is my mother. And that is because she is cute... and little when it comes to email, hasn't had it long, and doesn't realize how annoying it is. :)
2. Some of my favorite people in the world.... are still people from my childhood. People I will never see again. *Sigh*
3. Speaking of favorite people- I really love my pez friend. None of you know her. But I'm pretty sure I've found an eternal friend in her.
4. I think I'd make one hell of a casting director.
5. I wish I had blue eyes.
6. I seriously wish I could go back in time and be part of the cast of F.R.I.E.N.D.S.
7. I love the smell of a good bookstore.
8. I believe that a video game with a really good story... FEELS like acting. Yeah. I know. Weird right? But playing knights of the old republic... or Mass Effect, I really feel.. uhh. In character? Yeah. Weird. But so awesome.
9. If every process of theatre I go through for the rest of my life is like Closer- I'll be UBER content with the way my life is.
10. I wish I had more friends who liked video games. I don't really play them as much as I want to.
11. I'm convinced that one day I'll hug Natalie Portman.
12. And thank Amy Adams.
13. I aspire to have a career like Mary-Louise Parker. Stage, and film and WONDERFUL!
14. I want an action figure of me to be made. So Uhhh, I better be in an action film one day. :)
15. To me, the Adams Theatre is one of the happiest places on earth.
16. I like being asian. Eating chinese food always brings back feelings of my chinese family, and visiting them in Taiwan. And its, well its just a really happy feeling.
17. I wish I was better at pool and poker. They are quite delightful.
18. I despise change. I know on the other side its usually okay, but crossing through it bugs me.
19. I love when it is my birthday. My birthday is a very happy day for me. I approve.
20. I like weapons. I think knives and swords are SUPER cool. And I just think guns are fascinating. I don't think I'd ever want to use them to hurt people- so maybe I just like shiny things.
21. I wish I had a better vocabulary.
22. I call Chuck Taylor's "Clives." I saw sin city, Clive Owen wears Chucks, and ... I wrote a song titled: "Red Clives For Christmas" So yeah, if I ever say "Nice Clives!" Or "Ooo I want purple clives!" you'll know what I'm referring to now.
22. I'm not sure I like the shape of my face. I'm not sure I dislike it either.
23. Occasionally, only occasionally, I feel like a part of me is hiding behind my glasses.
24. Ellesse Smells.
25. I think I'm prone to addiction in all things because I have no self control. Hahahaha. Or hardly any.

"wow tash. The new pics really make you look like a star. Sexy too. You just keep rising up that ladder my friend. soon they'll give you two or three lines in a play..."
My best friend ladies and gentlemen.

Now is the Winter of Our Discontent

Author: Shexpeare /

I woke up this morning and it had snowed like crazy. Apparently it is the winter of my discontent. It sorta amazes me. The princess appeared, and my castle crasher buddies turned against me. Its two vs. one and I'm drowning.

underworld, underworld! la la la la la la UNDERWORLD!

Author: Shexpeare /

We had a pretty long saturday rehearsal, and Bugg brought us lunch. How awesome is he?! I hung out with Jen and Hye Soo last night.... that is when I realized it has been a long time since the Who Ha sisters had sometime together. I haven't been with the two of them in the same place for a long time. It was really great.
Cathy has a temporary phone. Thank God... seriously. Thank you God! :) It made me so happy to hear from her yesterday. Not to mention that she is my biggest fan, and when I feel like my acting is drowning, she always knows how to make me feel better.
I have wonderful images of Hye Soo and I walking through wal-mart doing Shakespeare. Hahaha. "Who would have thought the turkey to have so much blood in him!" Ahhh yessssss.
I had a really crappy emo week. But the weekend started very nicely.
I must Commit Fully. Like Peter on Heroes AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Right suki?
I love Jenny Whipple My Puppy.
Rhett Guter is good company.
The Seagull is going to be freakin' sweet. The costumes are amazing. Way to be Wendy! (My Hero!)
I am excited for the new Underworld movie. I mean, who knows if I'll love it as much, but you can see that I'm very happy I'm seeing it TONIGHT! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'll probably try to watch the other two sometime today. YAY!!!!!!!!! I have enjoyed the vampires in underworld many a time. Ooooo the joy!

Watch Me.

Author: Shexpeare /

"Wow, this movie is making me... you know.. .feel stuff and crap."
Watch It Now. Go on... Go on!

You sure she wasn't mexican?

Author: Shexpeare /

Me: Did you know the yellow power ranger died?
Joe: Oh yeah, I taught the red power ranger the gospel on my mission. He wasn't interested. But yeah, he said she died. The asian one right?
Ellesse: Wasn't she mexican.

....You are an idiot. Yup. You are right. She was black!!! I dunno man, all I know is that she was foreign and probably a terrorist.
*Looks Up Picture*
Me:... Yeah. You are an idiot.

For My Sanity.

Author: Shexpeare /

Closer Photos.
"The people in the photos are sad and alone, but the pictures make the world seem beautiful. So, the exhibition is reassuring, which makes it a lie. And everyone loves a big fat lie."

Closer is AWESOME. My favorite play. Seriously. And rehearsals are grand. I had a very good weekend. Closer pictures turned out wonderfully- Thank you Kaitlin's mom. It was great, probably because of the good company.
Lately I've been faced with situations that I've never been in before. My mind and heart are boggled. I don't know how to deal.

One of the funniest things that has happened to me lately, is acting out CLOSER with Lord of the Rings figures in Elle's attic. Oh wow. We've come to the conclusion that we all know the play so well that we can have everyday conversations using only lines from the play. Such as :
"I'm not hungry." ... "You slept with him didn't you." hahahaha Okay- well sorta. That isn't the greatest example, but the funniest. I like some responses. "Hey, did you give Alex the last pancake?" .... " I didn't give him anything." ... and the best response. "You're lying, I've been you."
Cathy's phone is broken. TheWorst.
There were several times this weekend when I made myself really vunerable to several different people. Everytime I did it, it turned out sorta horribly. That makes me miss Cathy. I was always honest with her, and she valued me despite my faults and vunerability.

Notes on a Scandal

Author: Shexpeare /

This movie made me feel sick. It was honestly amazing. The acting was perfect. Wow. I mean WOW Judi. Wow Cate. Can I have a hug?
Anyway, it didn't make me sick for the reasons you are thinking. Oh no. Judi Dench. She made me sick. I seriously need to reevaluate my life. 

London Bed Time Stories Appear Before My Eyes As If From Thin Air

Author: Shexpeare /

And I quote... "I can't decide if I like the movie "Closer" or not. I think I might like it..... I don't know. I need to see it again I think."  HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
Closer rehearsal= Happiest thing that has happened to me since my zombie survival book. *Sigh* It was all that I could ask for, and maybe more. The space. Beautiful. Intimate. I sat there looking around me, and I just couldn't believe that it was happening. It is finally happening. Awesome. Elle has great music in mind. Meggan is a freaking great director. It was a wonderfully safe work space, very collaborative. I don't think I've ever been to a rehearsal quite like it. Mmmm, I felt like I was creating something of value. Art. And everyone in the cast is doing really well. It is already in a very good place. The cast makes me feel the need to step it up. They are just on a higher level and I want to be better.
I just feel like Alice is coming along really nicely. I felt her in me. In a way I never have before. I think that she will appear more and more in the next few weeks. It just made me so happy. Y.A.Y.
Also, conversations like last night remind me of why I love that smelly girl so much.
Alex and I have a really great scene. I mean, one we didn't even know about. The first scene was SO much fun. It came so naturally. Something I've noticed about Patrick Marber- occasionally there are beat changes that must be memorized the painful way- but for the most part the responses are very in tune with the character and the actor. It is so easy. And I thought that first scene was very "blah!" Turns out its ridiculously cute, and SOOO happy and fun.
Acting makes me happy. Who knew? Yeah. You did I bet.

castle crashers is doomed

Author: Shexpeare /

At first, just the saved games were gone. Now it got deleted, and now it isn't working at all. Oh man. Shot down in the prime of life.

Poor little guys.

I'm a little obsessed with

It is the best.
I don't feel very happy lately. I feel like when I laugh, or smile, it is a HUGE relief from what I'm usually feeling. Ugh. I just feel like crap. I'm stressed. I don't even know exactly why I'm feeling this way. I mean, I could dump it on a billion things, but when it comes down to it... It just is. There. The crappy feeling. Its just there.
Crap. Crap. Crap. Laughter. Yay..... Crap. Crap. Crap.

"I don't want to lie, and I can't tell the truth, so it's over."

Author: Shexpeare /

Sweet. Apparently by the end of the semester I'll know what art is. Or at least, I'll have my own definition of what is art, and what isn't. Haha. That will be nice I suppose.
My brain is exploding. I feel a little overwhelmed by everything I'm doing, but it is all things I WANT to be doing, so that's good. I'm memorizing a lot, and its making my nose bleed. Hehhehe.
I miss Cathy. I always look around, to see if she is laughing at my jokes. Which.. well... even if she was here, she probably wouldn't be, because they aren't funny. :)
Closer reminds me of... how I feel like I can't get any closer. "We are not allowed to touch." And the one person I feel truly close to is an estimated 300 Grace Kelly's away. "Does it hurt?".."I'll live."
"The people in the photos are sad and alone but the pictures make the world seem beautiful. So, the exhibition is reassuring, which makes it a lie. And everyone loves a Big Fat Lie"

You are pushing a little too hard.

The Best New Years Goal I've Ever Heard.

Author: Shexpeare /

Cathy and I have a mutual New Years Goal. She thought of it, and I think it is quite neat.

Increase the frequency of when we get hyper.
Life needs to look more like this, FAR more often: