*Low* I can't stand this *high* i can't stand this!

Author: Shexpeare /

One Act call backs are today. I'm really excited. I'm not completely sure why, but I bet it is partly because last year call backs went really well for me. Cold reading is..... intense fun? It is just always a rush to get on stage not quite knowing what is going to happen. I like that. So yeah, I'm excited, and I'll have to tell you how they go later.

I was thinking about what One Act maybe I would do next year. I have a few good ideas. Some just won't work, but I'd like to pretend they might.

Emily Rule RULES. I miss shmoo. Bobby needs to just, appear right there *points*. Candace and I need to listen to more new music. People should not leave. Some people should not be gay.(Unlike Holly I DO mean homosexual) And others need to know me.
I hate B days. They are just the worst thing to hit the earth since loafed bread. I'm wearing Chris' sweater- but it is this really cool thing I like. I want one. Also, I doubt I'm going to be going to Morp, or prom, or any dance ever again EVER. LOL. I want to go to Morp, but the only people I want to ask probably can't go, or WON'T at that. And prom... I want to go, even though I'm not one for formal dances, I still want to go. It doesn't really matter though.
What I'm listening to:Nothing.
What I wish I was listening to: Mindless Self Indulgence.
I CAN'T STAND THIS! I can't stand this.
I did a monologue last night for my ward. It was cool. Wish me good luck with call backs! Blejkfejiosbei ofmseiosj fies b ifoe jsifoejs ifeo!

i dial zero.where is my hero.she's out there somewhere.left of the middle.

Author: Shexpeare /

It has come to my attention that one among us... might be considered a slight... trekkie.

It has also come to my attention that when people don't answer their phone I get frustrated. And that Candace needs fishnet stockings as well as weird red stockings.

Bobby and I found a camera in her car- and we took the rest of the pictures it had and developed them. Then we were looking through them and... and... whos camera is it?
SHMOOOOOOOOS!!! There was a picture of her overly large dog in it and we just KNEW. We are keeping it by the way.
Oh, and I picked the lock to the case for the pictures by the drama room. Hopefully someone has keys though eventually. It is kinda annoying.
Easter was disappointing today. UNLESS something happens by the end of the day. WHICH COULD HAPPEN! One never knows. Sometimes random adventures pop out of nowhere. So, I hope I have an Easter adventure.

to be...... or not to be.... all the worlds a staaageeee

Author: Shexpeare /

So this one time at theatre camp... me and jill were friends with this girl named Brianne. Not sure how that is spelled- either way it doesn't matter because we called her Puppydog. And I saw her yesterday. She came to the play, and she was in the faculty bathroom when I went to get ready. It was weird seeing her. And then I called Jill because you know how I do that when I get bored. Yeah- but we talked, and I miss Jill. We connected randomly, and bonded. And, if she lived here she would be one of my very good friends. I miss her.

I also miss mike. And when I say mike, I mean Brit. And when I say brit I mean mike. They are one in the same at theatre camp.

And I miss Boris. Who was really norma. I wonder if I will go back to theatre camp. EITHER WAY- CELESTE IS GETTING MARRIED. She texted me and said so. For those of you that met her, she is awesome, and I can only imagine that her guy is freaking cool. He better be hot- because she is a hottie mchotterson.

I'm really excited for the new, and final star wars movie. I'm really upset that my buddy up there (natalie portman) is .... well it is just going to be an unpleasant experience for her character. But hot dog, I LOVE STAR WARS!!!  Posted by Hello

Jealousy will drive you mad.

Author: Shexpeare /

Jealousy is such a terrible thing. I go crazy. When I let it take control of me....it causes me to do things I wouldn't dream of doing. I stop and think for a moment, and I realize the hate it brings up inside me. I wouldn't normally feel that way about someone. Or treat someone like that, no matter what they did to me. I regret.

It is a weird sensation in my chest. It is like feeling hurt, and you deal with it through anger.
And I keep saying to myself..... "It's not fair. It's not fair."

What's not fair? Forget being fair. Nothing is fair.

And still, after a whole lot of nothing, a whole lot of fuss- I will not get what I want. And just thinking that makes me say it again "It's not fair." Already I have that feeling in my chest.
But if I stop and think. I'm so ridiculous.
With this anger, there is something that feels like love.
Jealousy. Just a twisted version of love. Stop twisting my love. Fruitcake.

Not The Same

Author: Shexpeare /

Do you think that it is possible for one event, or one small chain of events to change someone?
Everything is always the same with me. I feel the change come slowly- but it is never drastic and no one ever notices.
I would like to change. Just become different. Not the same. In one day.
But I think that even with one big event, the change still comes gradually. But truely, I don't really know. Anyone here gone through a very fast change?

I've dealt with things that have broken me before. They broke my heart, and I had to pick up the pieces, and some of them are still on the ground. I feel like I'm about to be broken again. I am always disappointed by everything. I'm fragile now... after certain events I'm fragile in your hands. I don't trust my instincts.... or what they tell me. Not anymore.
We're still fighting it. We're still fighting it, and you're...so much... like me.... I'm sorry.

It hurts to be second. Because like steve said, you were waiting for that moment, and it didn't come. Someone else had it. Or is it worse to be first by default? Blah. So anyway, I'm learning four monologues at once. Two for auditions, one for english class, and one for a ward thing. WOOOHOOO!!

I've had a great day. And a CRAPPY day. Meh.


Author: Shexpeare /


We arrived at the bus station exactly the same time as the bus did. Right when we got on the bus two guys seemed very outgoing and greeted Kristi by telling her that the number on her shirt was also the number he used as a football player in high school. The two black men talked to us... randomly.... the 44 year old behind us told us about how we needed to pick a major soon. (He thought we were in college thanks to Kristis witty skills.) And he talked to us forever abour random stuff, eventually he gave up and started talking to his "brother".
It is strange, that listening to them gave me a head ache. Their lack of communication skills was sad. They would top each other and it was so funny because it really sounded like this:
"Yeah yeah-"
"No listen"
"Lemme finish"
"I hear you brother."
"I'm so glad we be talking foo'."

And then they were so happy that they understood each other and had that conversation and stuff... but nothing they said really made any sense. Anyway, then he kissed my hand (His name was stanley) when we got off. Off to the south town mall!
First... this mall is just cool.
Second. We took pictures in a little booth thingy.In the first one we didn't know it was taking pictures so we are both looking at random places. The second I look like ARNOLD trying to squeeze something particularly painstaking and kristi is normal. And the third she is smiling and I am laughing like a SCREAMING BANSHI.

Then we rode on a Carousel/Merry-go-round. She got the cool dragon. And I had an ugly horse. But the cool dragon was COOL! There was rap playing in the backround though, it seemed a little random and off.
Then we ate Beef Cheddar Melts. SOooooooo good. I love Arby's. Then we came home, thus ending our adventure. On our trip we also learned that sometimes Hot Topic is squishy and cramped. Forever Young is also a clothing store. Celestial Apple needs to be visited. We need to go back and explore that mall. Developing booth pictures takes 4 1/2 minutes and 5 to others.
I think that is all.
Did I miss anything?


Author: Shexpeare /

Adventures (I'm not sure what to write to explain exactly how awesome our adventures were):

First the car was retarded because of four wheel drive, and bobby just... didn't... remember that til it was basically too late.....

Okay, so we go to a hot dog stand and for the first time ever, I get a hot dog... at... a hot dog stand. It was freaking awesome! Then we bought a hot dog for a homeless man that was poisoning our food ten feet away. (He didn't really poison us, but if we die, thats what happened.)

Then we had the best ice cream ever.

We also went into this thuggin- THUGGIN book store. I mean I walked past the ally way (It was a cool chase scene place) and I could smell the books (literally) before I went in. They had all these rare books, and a cool coffee shop. And that is where I want to have my dream day, with the satchel of books and stuff remember? Awesome BOOK STORE! We need to go back and get a 25 cent book though.

"I'm scared of those people."
"What people?"
*Tasha looks around for five minutes.*
"The mexican people."

Then we went into the off broadway theatre and took a peek around. I decided that Kung Fooey sounded dumb and downstairs there was a sex couch. We decided it has been used.

Then we went to hillcrest, and we seriously thought that it was where we toured for king lear, but eventually we remembered it was highland.... It was exciting at the time to think that though. It was a maze, and I wish that our school was more of a maze. Knowing where places are, is just boring now. And their drinking fountain was cool.

"Pirate and/or Carribean Thursday." *pause*
"Today is thursday." *pause*
*Girl dressed in pirate and/or Carribean costume walks by.*

Queen Clark Parking Only.

Speed Dip.

"Take your hand off my butt."

"I will let you lick the cheetos off my fingers."
"But I don't want to."
"Baseball is boring." *Goes through the boring motions.*
"He runs funny."

Did I miss anything?

Happy birthday me!

Author: Shexpeare /

I had an awesome birthday!!! Thank you everyone, you were all awesome- and I had so much fun... and.... ahhh it was just the best!!!

"Where is this 'love'? I can't see it, I can't touch it. I can't feel it. I can hear it. I can hear some words, but I can't do anything with your easy words." Posted by Hello

laughter is the best medicine

Author: Shexpeare /

So I'm in newspaper class..... And in the next newspaper you should watch out for:

Something on me and my love for capes.

And an article on Shamae- that isn't all exactly true, but it is still awesome so you should read it.

AHAHAHAHAH!! I am so happy right now. Last class period I had shakespeare and I laughed for a half hour, no joke, I just couldn't stop laughing. It was so funny- we stole Chris' coat. Seaver would pull it out from under his chair and it would appear at the other end of the room and Chris would get confused and mad. Then this would happen again. This happened at least three or four times until finally we put it at the other end of the room and he couldn't find it. I know that doesn't seem funny, but it WAS, and besides that I was laughing at the "dog in the collar thing" and that one time when we tied Hoffman's sweater to her chair. The anticipation of her standing up was just too much, that I laughed all during that workshop.
Everything seemed funny today in that class, and I just couldn't handle it. And after you laugh for that long you just can't... NOT be happy.


Author: Shexpeare /

Candace is one of the funniest people I've ever met. Just because. And her bed is cool and comfy.
Kristi glaring and shutting the door, only to reopen it and glare again is REALLY hilarious.
Shamae asking me if I said "How do you spell hilarious?" is as well.
The "Marriage" talk and "SHE DIDN'T EVEN LEAVE THE ICE TRAYS THAT BIH" is awesome!
My new friend Emily is thuggin.
The word thug never fails to remind me of Cathy. I LOVE CATHY!
That also reminds me of beef. I don't really feel like eating meat right now.
I miss Marti for some reason- I never thought I would, but I talked to him today and I do.
I miss my old next door neighbors as well.

death cab

Author: Shexpeare /

The glove compartment isn't accurately named
And everybody knows it.
So i'm proposing a swift orderly change.
Cause behind its door there's nothing to keep my fingers warm
I was searching for some legal document
As the rain beat down on the hood
When i stumbled upon pictures i tried to forget
And that's how this idea was drilled into my head
Cause it's too important
To stay the way it's been

Sometimes i think this cycle never ends
We slide from top to bottom and we turn and climb again
And it seems by the time that i have figured what it's worth
The squeaking of our skin against the steel has gotten worse.
But if i move my place in line i'll lose.
And i have waited, the anticipation's got me glued.
I am waiting for something to go wrong. I am waiting for familiar resolve.